Wednesday, December 10

WHAT ARE FRIENDS FOR?



Declaration- This is a self analysis post. I aint a friendless person, writing this in frustration or out of loneliness, but this is something I have realized over time. Neither am I justifying myself.


Friends, amigos, buddies, and pals, we call them our extended families.
So they are. I have loads of friends; I make friends everywhere I go. I am a socialable person.
But friends? What are they??
Being an Indian, I bet you all are into the habit of using ‘Yaar’ with every sentence. But tell me how many people around you do you actually consider friends? How many do you really care about? How many do you stand for every time?
I read on a funny quotes portal a few days back,
“A friend is someone who is surely there when he needs.”
On the first thought, one would laugh at this, but on a serious thought, I guess everyone would agree.
I can at least take it on myself. I told it publicly in a
tag I did a few weeks back that I am very good at losing contacts. How mean… :(
I have many friends, of which some are really close and who I value more than anything. Sometimes I just wonder am I worth being a friend?
Trust, the basic ingredient of friendship, do I have it apt quantity in myself, am I enough trustworthy? My friends who tell me their secrets, don't I spill them knowingly? Over the blog or over into someone’s ears? I say 50-50. I am keeping a few secrets of my friends which I hope go with me to my grave, but I can just hope.
On the other hand, do I trust my friends? I say no. Save one or two closest friends, I do not tell anything to anyone. They call me secretive, insensitive, unsocial, rock-hearted and what not. Do not I deserve it? Well, I say I do.

I say, I am an echo, what ever I get, I give it back; I say, I am a mirror whatever I see, I show it back. As long as someone is good to me, I will be good to them. But that is not being modest, but then I say, even if I be modest, what awards am I gonna earn? The adjectives I have been awarded shall remain.
Why is it that when I really need someone to be besides me do I find myself alone? My worst fear is being left alone. So the way out I ‘ve found is to be alone, to learn it, to tackle it.

I see people around me, who are manipulative, mean, self- centred, arrogant, and high headed. I too might have been fit in these categories at times. But why do I be a dedicated friend? When I know I am not getting it back?
Expectations. They jump in from nowhere. I know I do not fit in the category of a dedicated friend, so how do I expect anyone else to be so…
(I think I need to sum it up now…)
I try being a good friend, though I fail at times. I love all my friends, at least those who I consider ‘friends’.
Blogger Guys, you are a blessing to me :)
Abhi, Divya, Kush, Vibs, Rupal, I miss you loadz guys..

Signing off for now…
XOXO!!


P.S. This post was initially intended for Mahul's blog, but the way it turned out, it is best suitable over here only, sorry buddy!!


21 Obiter Dicta (Comment here):

Arjun said...

I guess that's the way everyone are....
And I agree with u fully...

We can't change a lot of aspects in life.... The more we think abt it deeply n start worrying abt it, it serves no good...
We can all keep it simple, I guess... 'Be what u can while u never expect anything from another ...'

Sry if i sounded like crap..

Cheers..!!
Arjun

Twisted Elegance.... said...

Moral of the post:

Never tell your secrets to anyone...not even your best friend


:D

Born Vagabond said...

It's ok if you spill a couple of secrets here and there.....kuch nahi hota...chill maar yaar....opps sorry i used 'yaar'..:-)!!!

Sam said...

Just a quickie, a good post :)

wud be back for more details...stopped by to read in a brief!!

And buddy many thanks a tonne for the sweet comment u left on my blog. it made my otherwise gloomy day....thanks once again!!

Pranav Kumar V said...

"I see people around me, who are manipulative, mean, self- centred, arrogant, and high headed." Just say PK!! I'd be lying if I say I'm not any of the above other than mean!! Hey hey hey, hold it!! That's not all. For people whom I take as friends, they're there for a lifetime!! I can meet them after years and still we talk like it was just yesterday we met. That's what counts right?? And when it comes to helping, I get so carried away, I end up doing all the work for my buddies!! They know how to bend me!! :( They alone. That's fine.

I'm SURE this post will get you declarations of more friends, friends for life. But sadly, most will fade!! (I'm serious buddy!! :P No I'm actually serious!!)Such is the scheme of things. I don't make friends with everyone I meet, I am anti-social, I need to evaluate before I make a move. Big deal!! If they're there, it'd be lasting for a lifetime!! And losing contacts, ask me, I have "friends" whom I haven't met since I left school!! Life's always catching up you know!!

See you when I see you... :)

P.S. I cannot recollect ONE person with whom I've lost my friendship!! Now, THAT'S SOMETHING!! That's how PK is, ultra-lite about the issues of life and too busy living the Small Things in life.

vinay said...

a smile :)

Divya said...

aww bachi.. hope you are doing well! its alright to have these doubts every now and then, all of us do, but i believe, in the end friends are truly those who you think of when you are really upset and need someone to talk to. you know, its only a true friend who will have the patience to listen to you and understand you. course, you'll have plenty of friends during happy times. and mean, selfish and all that you have mentioned, a person can be all that and still be a good friend. surely, all of us have some of those qualities, no one is without flaws. co cheer up babe :) a little faults here and a little spilling of beans there is allowed. we are all human!

lukkydivz said...

those one or two people u were talking about...those are ur real friends :)

Praveen said...

friendship..
where words like expectation have no place.
where we live selflessly savouring the joy of the company.
there are no secrets..there are no plots..what you see is the reality..

those r my ideas of perfect friendships
although its hard to achieve, I always make sure that its somewhere close to this

Mayank said...

Acha hai, Acha hai.....

Madam kayi baar emotional ho kar bhi likhate hai.....

Richa said...

@ Arjun

no u dint sound like crap, it the reality, n we have to prepare ourselves to tackle the realities, n stop living in mirages.. :)

thnx buddy!!

Richa said...

@ twisted elegance

yeah ths ryt :D

Richa said...

@ Vagabond

thnx for droppin by n ur support :D

n never mind, dun b sorry, Yaar :D

Richa said...

@ SAM

thnx buddy :)

come back soon..

n u r always welcome.. :)

Richa said...

@ Pranav

thnx for all ur support buddy :)
my frnz too are for life time, n regading losing contct, ppl who really matter nver go, they juz stay - no matter wat:)

Richa said...

@ Vinay

thnx for ur smile :)

Richa said...

@ Divya

thnx for all ur support buddy :)

u all mean soo much..

Richa said...

@ Divz

yeah ths ryt buddy :)
they r frnz..

Richa said...

@ praveen

ths real nice..
i mean there r ppl who try to achieve.. :)

i need to work on myself :)

Richa said...

@ mayank

hmm..
look my frnz.. they r happy i m emo.. :D :P

Keshi said...

The term FRIEND is overrated, just like LOVE. Not everyone can be a friend, neither can we be a friend to everyone else. It all depends on personalities of one another.

In real I hv only 2 ppl I can call true FRIENDS. Sometimes we dun meet for months but when we do meet we pick up from where we left last..just the way it was. To me, thats what a FRIEND is...a timeless and an undying internal connection that dun depend on anything external.


In blogworld, I hv so many acquaintances. But FRIENDS, again only very few. I hv been hurt so many times cos I EXPECTED some others here to be really wonderful friends, when in real they turned out to be just time-servers. I dun give my time or emotions to such ppl anymore. Im not the greatest mate on Earth either but I never treat ppl like they r nothing. trust me, alot of ppl here hv done that to me!


Anyways Im glad I know who's who now. True FRIENDS r very rare...thats the only thing I can say abt FRIENDSHIP.

Come n check out my Update..:)

TC HUGS!
Keshi.

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