Wednesday, February 24

Do relationships come cheap?




Case 1: The couple had been living in since past 7 years and finally they decided to get married. God only knows why. And they separated in 1 month of their marriage.

Case 2: Arranged Marriage. Girl is a perfect daughter-in-law material. She performs her duties well. Takes care of everyone in the household but doesnt talk to her husband. They separate within 2 months of marriage. The guy gets married again. And same happens all over again. They separate again within six months this time. And now the guy is looking for another marriage.

Case 3: Arranged Marriage. Both girl and guy are engineers, working. They get married after a courtship of 3 months. Honeymoon tickets booked for Singapore the next week of the wedding day. They miss the trip somehow and go to Simla instead. Girl doesnt come back with the husband, rather returns to the PG she was residing at before her marriage. Separation.

I am not making this up. Recently I have heard of such 3 break ups in my close relatives. Case 1 is from Mumbai, 2 from Kolkata and and third one in Delhi.

Off late, I have been hearing of many break ups. Break ups as in divorces. Divorces of newly wed couples. I might be unaware of, but I guess this is a new trend developing in Metros. People get married, and separate in a few days of their marriage. Not just in arranged marriages but even in Love marriages.

I might not be the right person to comment on relationships. Or marriages. You may call me stuck in old times. But I still think marriages are relationships for lifetime. There are extreme situations when there is no other alternative left except divorces, but not even trying to settle in and taking a step as huge as this is insanity.


Oh yeah there is another aspect that there is no use dragging a relationship which doesnt work out. But then, who forced into getting married in the first part?

All right. Even if you were forced into the marriage, how do you after getting married think it is okay to break it up. It doesnt simply get into my mind.

Speaking of relationships, this new show on Bindass Channel called the "Emotional Attyachar". This show, I guess has got a high TRP. In my opinion, whatever they do on the show is totally offensive. They spy on a person. And show it on National Television. This could be a scripted show as every other reality show. If it is, I say Kudos to the creative team. If it isnt, I dont understand why do these people come to the show if in any case they are going to lose the relationship. They conduct so called 'loyalty test' on their partner. If their partner cheats, they dump them, and if they dont cheat, why would they stay in a relationship where their partner doesnt trust them.

As I understand it, relationships come cheap. As a famous Aamir Khan Dialogue goes 'Aaj Pooja, Kal koi dooja'! bleh!




39 Obiter Dicta (Comment here):

Amit said...

Nice Read... but not a nice phenomenon .. The reason y even love marriages don't work is that people dont really understand love or marriage for that matter.. dating for a while hardly guarantees understanding the other individual ..and ..living with a person is an entirely different thing..

ANWESA said...

The 3 cases makes me dumbfounded.

Emotional Atyachar is just another show that depicts the "perils of love".

Americanising Desi said...

it just is a sad reality!

wonder if it is the scare or the commitment that is germ ed!

Sanjay said...

Great post!

Must admit that most of the that i have come across here are really purposeful and are worth giving a thought about it. I must say you are one of my favorite bloggers in that perspective. Keep up the good work!
Keep posting more of them. Would love to read more of you.

Cheers
Sanjay

अनिल कान्त : said...

इंसान को पूर्ण स्वतंत्रता चाहिए और उत्तरदायित्व नहीं उठाना चाहता . किसी भी रिश्ते में आपसी समझ और खुद को चीज़ों के हिसाब से ढालना ही पड़ता है अन्यथा परिणाम तलाक ही होते हैं.

Gaurav Kant Goel said...

Nice post and a great insight. :)

Keep writing!

Charmed One! said...

yup nobody wants to work on relationships anymore.. just start taking each other for granted ...

nice post girl .. i wrote something similar just the other day :)

Harshita said...

I think..high-time people shud realize what a marriage is all abt...


there is no point in getting married if u have to separate anyways...

My already shaken faith in marriage has shaken a little more :D

But the post is all abt truth... glad u brought it up.n be regular...

Aditya Nandode said...

True! Relations come cheap these days! But then so do honesty, love and other such good things. Sign of times!

Diablo said...

Cant agree more..!! really..and It was really sad to know abt those 3 cases..
and ya, I completely agree with ur views abt that "emotional atyachaar" thing.. personally I feel its crap anyways..but..
"If their partner cheats, they dump them, and if they dont cheat, why would they stay in a relationship where their partner doesnt trust them." these lines says it all..
keep writing.. hats off..!!

sawan said...

havnt seen emotional atyachar, but hrd a lot about it. as far as I understand, the producer and creative head of it shud be shot to death in public.
for the rest of the post, I dnt think there has been much changes in the living style or attitude of people now compared to those olden golden days. so what makes so many relationships break? OPTIONS. our options have increased lately. single parents are widely accepted in the society unlike olden days, single parents earn and are financially independent. no one wants to sacrifise their life and everyone thinks that no one has the right to “impose” thoughts on them. result – breakup. cant blame anyone. life changes as lifestyle does.

oRange* said...

right. even im hearing about too many break ups recently. makes me sad

Ria said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ria said...

well said dear...this is something which i will never understand...anyways i m obsolete for this generation....at least thats what i think!who else sticks to a guy for a decade and dreams of having a beautiful future with him!!

ani_aset said...

a relationship needs a lot of sacrifice and commitment, else it is not a relationship in the first place

Vinod R Iyer said...

I guess before marriage you have a bit of leverage to do all these things. And then breaking up even. Breaking up after marriage is a sad thing !

akanksha said...

Is it really happening? :(

Dewdrop said...

There's no doubt that separations is a heart breaking thing and to an extent i agree that one needs to give the relationship a chance, with patience and perseverence. However, there could be many reasons where a divorce is justified - dowry / domestic violence / unreasonable demands / unfaithfulness... at the end of te day, it is important to be happy and safe.

яノςんム said...

@ Amit,
yeah i second u on tht.. dating is a seperate thing but living with someone is entirely different.. living with even ur best friend is difficult :D

яノςんム said...

@ Anwesa,
this is happening in real world.. and tht show is really really idiotic..

яノςんム said...

@ AD,
i know tht sweetie..
really dun understand where is this heading to..

яノςんム said...

@ Sanjay,
thnx :)

яノςんム said...

@ Anil Kant,
main aapse poorntah sehmat hoon.. shaadi aur talaak to aaj kal jaise ek khel ho gaya hai..

яノςんム said...

@ Gaurav,
thnx :)

яノςんム said...

@ Charmed one,
i think the reason is, the options available.. ppl do not want to work things out but move on..
and i wud read ur post for sure :)

яノςんム said...

@ Harshi,
lol i know :D and u know even my faith gets quakes :P

yeah trying to get back :D

яノςんム said...

@ Adi,
ghor kalyug :D

яノςんム said...

@ Diablo,
these things are happening to ppl i know.. and i bet there must be worse cases..

and yeah the show is total crap!

яノςんム said...

@ Anil,
if u havent watched tht show, i d say dont even try watching it.. they portray a very seriouss investigation show..

and i cudnt agree with u more about the Options things.. u said it all :)

яノςんム said...

@ orange,
it really is heatbreaking..

яノςんム said...

@ Ria,
hats off to u girl :)

яノςんム said...

@ Ani,
u said it all.. :)

яノςんム said...

@ Vinod,
:) break even in relationships is a nice concept.. will think about it more :D

яノςんム said...

@ Akki,
unfortunately yes..

яノςんム said...

@ Dewdrop,
as i said there are exceptions where it is necessary.. :)

Arv said...

Bad trend... People ought to talk it out when they need to instead of letting it grow into something worst... :(

яノςんム said...

@ Arv,
options as i said, make the talking just a non requirement..

JoHn said...

relationships do come cheap bigtime in todays world. everyone is dispensable to everyone else and no one wants to get rid of the vain self ego.

maybe the world needs a damn break from "relations" to understand the true value...

regards
john
http://imeandnotsomuchofmyself.blogspot.com/

Pathfinder ! said...

marriage has lost its meaning, indeed !

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